Fortnight Spotlight: Intro To Desire Mapping

FREE Desire Mapping Planner and Introductory Workshop

So what is Desire Mapping?

Desire Mapping, is, at its base, about moving away from expectations and moving towards your core desired feelings.

You have been on certain “track” all your life, moving from one goal to another, perhaps even moving between goals that you never even put in place but were in place for you – education, career, marriage, babies, more career etc. etc.

Somewhere along the way, with all the busyness, all the balls in the air, all the to do lists, you lost track of what you actually want.

In fact you don’t even know what you actually want, or what is actually wrong.

All you know is that somewhere, deep down, something just doesn’t feel right.

It’s time to get tribal, insightful, back to basics, to your core, ceremonial, ritualistic, whatever you want to call it.

You just have to urgently pare everything back to basics and address the following questions:

How do you actually want to feel in every area of your life; and
What do you need to do to get there?

Why focus on feelings?

Well if you are readings this I am guessing you have already tried the Good Life / Material Possessions thing.

How did that work out for you?

Did the new shoes work? Maybe for a week?

The nice highlights? A couple more?

The designer handbag, the vacation, the promotion all fill the void for a while…we’ve all been there. But the fact is..

You’re here, reading this.

So, Expectations / Material Possession / Instagrammable Life – not quite working then. And you are in good company.

How about focusing on what feelings to strive for instead?

That, at its core, is Desire Mapping.

Getting clear on how you want to feel in everything in your life and then setting your goals or intentions to match those feelings.

We call the feelings you want to feel – the cornerstones of your ideal life – your Core Desired Feelings.

By the way just to be clear, you are not a Stepford Wife; you are not expected to breathily wander through life gleefully expounding to all who will listen about how you are enjoying experiencing your Core Desired Feelings.

Life happens, s%$t happens – on a daily basis, on an hourly basis.

We can go through a full gambit of feelings in a minute – that’s living.

The point of this exercise is simply to get us out of Instagrammable Life Impossible Notions and Aspirations and just getting to the feeling space – the Core Desired Feelings.

If nothing else this exercise gives you a gauge as to where you are now – this is how I feel, this is how I want to feel, this is what I am going to do to get there.

So how do you identify your Core Desired Feelings?

Welcome to Desire Mapping!

Step 1: How do you want to feel?

Write down as many words as you can to describe how you want to feel.

Once you’ve written as many as you can, see if they fit into groups of similar feelings that be described a certain way.

Have you drilled down to the real feeling? Or an expectation? For example if you have written down success (and there ain’t no shame in that!) Try and dig deep into where that is coming from – is it your Core Desired Feeling or is it because it has always been expected of you – i.e. that you would be successful? Do you actually want this or is it simply that someone else always wanted it for you. That’s not to say you shouldn’t want to be successful but what is your definition of it – corporate board room or yoga on a beach? Are there other Core Desired Feelings that better describe for you the experience that you yourself want to have?

Try to narrow your words down to a maximum of 4 – these become your CDFs – always open to change as you want to change them.

Are your words dependent on external validation: respected, honoured, seen, heard, etc… or show you are always giving: nurturing, organising, creating, etc.

The idea is that your words encompass the feeling, not how you want to make others feel or they make you feel.

Try to dig down to the core of how you want to feel.

Step 2: Set Your Intentions

Setting goals with soul – intentions that match your feelings

Now you know how you want to feel, let’s look at setting 3-4 intentions that will help you feel that way…

Consider this question – what do I need to do to feel the way I want to feel?

Do I need to change jobs? If that is not possible now do I need to take the necessary steps so that it can be? Take a course / start a side hustle that is more aligned with my Core Desired Feelings, start saving for a travel sabbatical?

Do I need to leave a stale relationship? Do I need to work at a relationship to make it thrive? What steps do I need to take to do align my relationships to my Core Desired Feelings?

Do I need to get my health and wellness in order? What steps am I going to take to do this?

Do I need to start saying no to certain things? To certain people?

Do I need to do something for no other reason then because my gut has been whispering to me to do it forever and I just can’t shake the feeling?

If you are struggling with setting your intentions consider this:

What makes you feel amazing and on-purpose?

Which brings you the most satisfaction and joy?

What makes you feel miserable?

What do you resent doing?

Setting goals with soul – intentions that match your feelings

Once you’ve:

Established your Core Desired Feelings
Established your intentions that will allow you to feel the way you want to feel

It’s time to get practical. Ask yourself:

What do I need to do to make the changes over the coming months?

What 3-4 goals or intentions can I work towards?

Where can I turn to for inspiration when things are getting tough?

What can I do to improve my energy and focus when times are tough?

If this all seems great but a little overwhelming then why not just arm yourself with our FREE Desire Mapping Planner and Introductory Workshop – Click here to get your free printable copy:

FREE Desire Mapping Planner and Introductory Workshop